Why do we fear......
Read moreRetro Restoration
"Restoration is a "dirty" word... meaning in order to restore a life, a house, or anything I can think of, I've got to be willing to get dirty. This work is by far one of the most challenging, and rewarding, works of the kingdom....."
Read moreAlternate reality
"I have found not any other person can attempt to tell me how to handle loss. The almost five year mark we are coming upon does not negate the memories. The most recent losses suffered only serve as reminders to the traumas witnessed on that one sacred day that would send life into the alternative reality I now find myself in....."
Read moreAlterations.
So much has transpired here in less than a week's time, which has become my "norm"; I somehow have an altered sense of time since my "change of life" 2 1/2 years ago. My awareness is heightened, as to life alterations and lost relationships; I don't think I like it.
I sometimes feel my whole sense of time isn't calculated by earthly measurements anymore, but is counted with eternal applications. Kind of like being in fast forward. I don't want to miss out on anything; I'm notalways patient. I assume others want the same, but they may not see what I see.....
It seems in general, the Cali culture places emphasis on "enjoying life" and all things associated with that lifestyle. Generally speaking, many of the stereotypes ring true. Paying a fortune for real estate that is not worth the value placed on it is fascinating. The aspect of "work" is completely different than back East, in our experience.
Having finished his first year at Redondo Union, we're so glad Logan worked hard and finished strong:) Much of his time is accounted for this summer, but he needs to find a job. Probably not landscaping or mowing lawns like back home because those jobs would not go to him......
We have been working furiously, packing and moving, since finding a 2 BR, 2 Bath apartment in Redondo Beach. The favor of the Lord was upon us, as everything came together at a perfect time, location, and owners. This place is a 4 unit, family owned building that we think already feels more like home than our current apt. Now, with God's grace, I deal with my manager in the moving process.....
I signed a lease for another year on Weds.night and we carried our first load in:) Tomorrow movers come to the few bigger items over. Everything is boxed and ready. This place is closer to the beach for biking, and Logan's school. A local dog park and nursery is nearby. God is good. Thank you for prayers. We couldn't be more ready for another fresh start.
Tonight I spent time in Palos Verdes, at my favorite protected space, where I go to sit in the quiet and listen to what the Lord says to my heart. I have set aside the summer for some personal goals, guidance, and growth. Tis my season.....
Even if the separation from your loved one was expected or totally unplanned, you are left to find out who you are without the light of their love in your life......
"For those living in the land of the shadow of death (darkness)..... a light has dawned."
Intervene.
Reliving moments has never been quite my style, even the good ones. I revel in it but realize they are times past. They were good then, but now there is more. Day by day, I'm taking time to pen what I hope is my first book in the making. The "reliving" is a stretch for me.....
But it is in the midst of these moments I'm forced to face my past, that I remember all the goodness poured out in our suffering. Prayers flowed, as tears fell. Very few times was there one without the other.....Many stood in the gap for us and still do.
It is in standing in the gap for another, intervening in prayer, practical support, love and patience, does the emptiness become filled. If no one steps in that place of support, emptiness fills the vacuum loss leaves in its wake.... and then it takes years and years to recover. Be the one who does something.
As myself and the kids think of a family back home who is feeling such pains tonight, our hearts go out. May God be with you.....
I've been grateful to find those closest to us to be faithful; there are some who will be with me always, and others counted on for a period of time. As I again feel pushed into something new, I have to make choices to move with this flow or fight against it. I'm choosing the former.....
I worked a long day today, 8:30-5:30, and actually enjoyed it:) School is winding down with finals this week for Logan, which we both are tired of studying for, lol. June is a packed month and looks like we may be adding one more thing..... more details to come.
I'm determined to search for real happiness here........ and anticipate finding it. I've traded in the former for the future.