Even though I am not a great gardener, I have a love for plants. Greens. Flowers. Colors. Variety. Living in L.A. county was tough on me, having no space or freedom to "plant." Austin noticed the beauty of the colors all around us today, which stands out more brightly than ever before......

While I unloaded a small box with a few flower plants, it almost tipped over and I thought about the potential for a mess. As much as I hate messes, it often takes one to force me to change..... to make a decision...... to bring about a determination to do something different.

God knows I've cleaned up enough "messes" in my life over the course of many years, some worse than others. I guess that gives me a good amount of experience in dealing with life...... and giving to others what is needed. This ability comes from going through stuff....... and coming out on the other side.

This mentality has made me push beyond any limits and know most anything can be conquered. The flip side is that I don't often know my limits anymore without my late husband's limitless presence. Perhaps I picked up something he carried...... and am running with it........

The tenacity required in my life is pretty ridiculous. After phone calls, orders placed, and answers given, a few household things are getting taken care of. I still need to call about my new ice maker not working right, but thankfully it is under warranty.

I have learned not to feel stupid if I need to ask a few questions for clarity or to understand what I'm hearing in the business world. I used to simply ask a man when I needed help; now I am relying more on myself again. More growing pains.........

Tonight I signed a lease for my last available rental and plan to put a rest to the "unrest" I have experienced. And tomorrow I will be doing an Open House from 1-3 in Topton during our Community Days event, so come out and see me! I am all about our local community because I know how special it is...........

The month of May has been pretty mysterious so far and we're 15 days in. In this week alone we've seen medics next door, dealing with a heroin overdose, along with the many issues arising in the school. I am not losing hope.............. but remain hope filled.

And I am willing to share.

I have realized since my husband's passing, more so than any other time in my life, the importance of paying attention to my consumption. As a widow trying to make ends meet monthly, I literally watch what we consume; however, I am now talking about what feeds the soul.............

Too many times it's easy to dismiss something or someone as not harmful or we negate the effects, but I know the power of hope and hopelessness. Hopelessness is heavy. It makes me feel just a bit more on edge, fearful, and worried. Hope is heartfelt and healthy; it' is not processed, but fresh.

I end up turning off, tuning out, or disengaging in any toxic situation because I can't tolerate it any longer and I am a pretty tolerant person smile emoticon I want to hear an "I can do it" attitude, a "nothing will stop me" mantra in order to make it, as to not live under the weight of the worries....... I am tired of it.

In saying that, I am looking to start the month of May with many successes. In spite of a few setbacks at the Capitol Wednesday, I renewed my real estate license! Tomorrow, I sign the official papers as a Berkshire Hathaway Homeservices Realtor in PA smile emoticon And you can count on me to work hard for you:)
I do not give up.

It feels like another chapter in my life is beginning........

I have put in several hours at the rental we are turning around, with the help of the kids and John. We knew upon our return, we would need to get our "house in order", and I have several. As a landlord and manager, I must be present. I am fully engaged. "Spring cleaning" is almost complete.

I will hold showings tomorrow in hopes of finding a tenant to move in by May 1. Lord willing; I must be blessed in this area to continue. My husband had his way of doing things and we are figuring out ours. It is not easy; we are all working so hard still. The transition has been an intense one.

But just as a transition in labor comes to an end, there is a birthing that suddenly takes place; a time where everything comes into alignment and then boom, the blessing reveals itself. Getting to the point of delivery is intense, but once there, it is rewarding.........

Nite.