When my husband passed on unexpectedly, the one thing staring me in the face was the issue of dependency. I was with him since age 17; he was ten years older and always seemed wiser. I automatically care for.

As I now faced my future alone, I knew there would be a radical shift from how I had spent the past 25 years. I did not feel ready..... I honestly still don't. I really have no choice but to shift my perspective into a healthier one. This has been an ongoing process for me........

It's taken me six months here in Southern Cal, but I've come to accept things with ease, more than I used too. While I learn what it's like to be independent at my age, my daughter is as well. Beginning this weekend, she should be settling in with a roommate, in a rental place of her own. She's already taken half the closet with her:/

My family reminisced on this day, marking what would've been my "special" nephew Skyler's 18th birthday. He passed on just 17 months after his Uncle Doug, much to our surprise. I so clearly remember the day of Skyler's birth, and the days leading up to it. They were traumatic to say the least. His prognosis was dire, but we knew better..... and he lived for 17 years.......

Skyler was dependent on his parents, family, teachers, and caregivers for his care while on earth. But, in hindsight, we were the ones who came to depend on him...... his smiles, giggles, sense of humor, and funny phrases or sounds.

It is in his memory and in honor of his life I say Happy Birthday Skyler. I know where you are and can guess what you're doing........ you were a great teacher to us all.

"Never say never, because limits, like fears, are often just an illusion....."
Michael Jordan