At this moment in EST, 3 years ago today, my kids and I drove home from a hospital near our home town...... having suddenly witnessed death and been wounded by it. We sat closely in our Toyota Corolla that night, the same vehicle we would later travel cross country in..... both times, we weren't sure if we would make it.........

It was because of this night, 11.4.11, that a stirring began..... and a call we could not run away from. Even in our hardest days here, then and now, there remains a depth of determination that not one of us can deny. This manifests in a variety of ways, and through each of our personalities........

Sometimes I think I see the ways it's impacted one of us more than another.... and then I see I am wrong. We have all been equally affected. What we choose to do with the "situation" requires some kind of motivation, for better or worse.

In the Book of Psalms, chapter 56, David speaks of the difficulties he had at a time in life where it seemed everything was after his happiness. I imagine this left him feeling as if he could hardly handle it all. In verse 8, he describes his belief that my God in heaven collects my tears, in a bottle and a book. He actually knows me......... He remembers you, me, us.......

I wondered if I would ever feel the same emptiness I felt the night of November 4th, and the answer is.... yes. I have. I am changed. I will never be the same. These emotions must serve my future and not aid my past.
His intervention may not always come in my timetable or in the ways that I would like, but I do know one thing. It will come. He will come.

Three years later, my kids and I are spread out. Logan is at a Redondo Girls VB game with teammates, showing support to the girls on a big night. After hanging onto a Spanish project he had to do for the last two weeks, he chose to complete it today..... and appropriately so.

I leave you with this tonight.....after my tears are recorded, "then my enemies will turn back, when I call for help. By this I will know that God is for me. In God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me? For you have delivered me from death, and my feet from stumbling, that I may walk before God in the light of LIFE."

May the Lord be praised.

After a fun filled weekend, Jordan makes his way back to his home in SF. He spent time between our apartment and Chynna's place, on the beach, playing sports, and hanging out. I took pleasure in cooking a bit more while he was here too:) I think we make each other better......

On this Memorial Day, we remember the wounded, the warriors and those whose sacrifice seems to go unnoticed...... They are living all around us and often feel forgotten because few fully understand, or even try to........ or even care. As long as our "good life" goes untouched, why get involved.

Unless touched or impacted by something significant, the vain and meaningless things of this world take all our attention. There's nothing new under the sun, wise King Solomon said so long ago. Nothing's changed except the choices we make.... the priorities we pursue.

Most everything in our culture has become about self, thus making the sacrifices of a few good men and women, all the more outstanding. This knowledge drives my ambitions.....

As the paths we pursue become even more clear, one thing remains true: this is not about me. This is far more than I could imagine.

"I pray the eyes of your heart be enlightened...." to see beyond oneself and onto another.

Goodnight.